The Zoo

Sorry about my lack of post yesterday. Josh worked a half day (since he worked til 11p.m. the night before) and we took the kids to the zoo. I was very disappointed. It was SO sad! The animals are in tiny enclosures. At least they aren't square metal cages, but still. It was so sad for me to see the monkeys just sitting there, staring back at me from their concrete pen. And the giraffe had a postage stamp size area of grass. The saddest part of all was the polar bear. He was swimming in circles over and over and over and over; doing the exact same thing every time. He'd swim around the perimeter of his pool, push his plastic toy out of the way, get to the end, do a back flip, swim on his back for one length and start all over.

Maybe it's different in the summer. Maybe they have bigger outdoor areas that they let the animals use, but wow. I felt really bad for them. I know they get good care and easy meals, but still. To just have to sit or swim in such tiny enclosures compared to what they'd have in the wild was sad.

Ok, I'm getting off my soapbox now. ;-)

My weight is holding steady at 167. Honestly, I haven't been trying at all to lose weight. Haven't been eating well or exercising. My chicken I baked up is still sitting in the fridge, and I'm pretty sure it's bad now. How long can baked chicken stay in the fridge? It's been a week and a couple days. I've had one green smoothie all week. I mixed up some more this morning and will drink some, but my spinach is gone and I need to cook up more chicken.

I've lost motivation to lose weight. Why? I'm not sure. I feel pretty happy with my life. The stress of finding a house is gone. The stress of packing is still there, but I plan to enlist some of the girls from our church youth group to help me with that. I know I still have weight to lose, and lots of it. I can see it in the mirror.

I think part of the problem is that I am so tired all the time. I mean, it's abnormal. Last night I fell asleep at the dinner table. Like a little kid. Sitting there eating, and the next thing I know my husband is gently shaking me telling me it's time to go to bed (at 5:30pm). I have NO energy. None. I probably need to get my thyroid checked, but I just can't be bothered right now. I've been through that rigamaroll before and it didn't really seem to help that much.

I'm going to keep striving to eat clean and healthy. I'm going to keep buying healthy food. This week I made a batch of one of my favorite cookies- the coconut milk chocolate ones, and I've only had 3 so far all week. I'm sort of over them now. Maybe I'll hit up Costco today for more salad, but since Josh will be gone til Friday night I feel like I might need to conserve my energy. :-P

Anyway, I don't want to give up totally because I *do* want to lose these extra pounds. I do want to become healthy. But I guess I just started feeling like it was ruling my life, dictating everything I did and ate, and it just got to be too oppressive. I feel that I really need to focus on my kiddos; they are going through, um, interesting times. It's never been "easy" having 3 little ones so close together, but as they get older and start understanding more of what's going on and start realizing that they don't always want to do what I ask them to... Well, it's hectic and stressful and I'm trying to learn every day new ways to work with them.

So that's where I am right now. I will probably start blogging a little less frequently, just because I need to start cleaning and packing and such. But I don't want to disappear because I know that I'll lose all motivation/accountability if that happens. So, the Skinny Turtle will be around... you just might have to look a little harder to find her. ;-)