Monday, January 31, 2011

Blah Blah Blah Blah

Hey Folks,
Sorry for my lack of post on Friday. I actually just forgot. I left the house at 8:30 and didn't get back until after 4pm, and then had to make and take a meal to a mom who just had a baby. I can't even remember that far back, so I don't know what I weighed or what happened that day.

Today I was up to 138.4; I should be fasting but I don't know if I can do it. Josh is gone again and we had a really stressful, busy weekend. Our toilet overflowed one too many times, so we ripped it out, along with the bathroom floor and replaced it all. I say "we" loosely; mostly Josh did it. There are a lot of underlying stressors and I'm just going to play it by ear regarding fasting. I know part of the problem is I need to have some waste management action... as usual. :-P

I didn't drink nearly enough water yesterday; this morning I couldn't get my ring off, a sure sign of water retention. So I'm confident that the extra weight isn't fat, but instead just water weight and waste weight.

That was really boring, sorry.

Anyway, I'll be back tomorrow, hopefully with a weight loss that puts me back to 137.4, which is where my body seems to have settled this round.

Sorry I don't have more to say; life is busy at the moment and taking all my energy and attention just to survive and try to be a good wife, mom, sister AND take good care of my body.

Have a good Monday!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Holding Steady

Whew, it's Thursday. The day Josh comes home! He won't be home til way late again, due to some fundraising he's doing for church, but at least he'll join me in the bed at some point. I don't sleep well when he's not here. Not because I'm scared; I actually feel very safe and secure in our house and neighborhood. It's just that Josh and I are cuddlers. In a big way. So when he's not there it's like a vast void. I miss him.

My weight seems to have evened out. I was up 0.2 this morning, which is much more normal than gaining pounds. I feel better, too. The last few days I've been getting killer stomachaches. I have been doing really well at getting in lots of water, although today I've had mostly coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.

I had my mom and sister over for our weekly Coffee Thursday visit and I made Joy's Cream Cheese Cinnamon Rolls. They were mighty delicious. SOOOO good, but very rich. I doubled the inside yumminess, because I omitted the nuts and raisins. I'm not a nuts and raisins girl. Anyway, they would have been just fine without having doubled the gooey part. They were a bit too sweet. But I still managed to eat a whole one, over the course of an hour. =)

Sherah, the granola bar recipe I have is originally from Jen. I'm not sure where she got it, but it's super easy:

2 cups oatmeal
2 cups rice krispys
1/2 cup light karo syrup
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup peanut butter
1 tsp vanilla

Bring karo syrup (and don't try to make your own... it doesn't work! You have to use the premade Karo syrup) and brown sugar to a boil. Once it's at a rolling boil take it off and add the peanut butter and vanilla. (I've been leaving the vanilla out, cuz it doesn't change the taste that much.) Once the peanut butter melts, pour it over the cereal in a big bowl. Quickly mix it all together so the cereal gets coated and then press into a greased 9x13 pan. I just use the back of a rubber spatula to press it into the pan. You CAN double this recipe but you just have to use a little more karo syrup and brown sugar, to make sure you have enough sauce to coat all the cereal. Let it set up for a few minutes and then cut into bars.

Basically it's a similar version of rice krispy treats. But with oatmeal and without marshmallows.

Anyway, sorry for all the food talk. I'm just happy that even with the baking I've been doing, and the consuming of said baked goods, my body seems to be metabolizing it. And I've been being careful not to overeat. To eat slow and stop when I feel full. I like this way of life. =)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011


Fasted all day, then ate steak and an apple for dinner? Check.

Drank 100+oz of water and coffee? Check.

Started period? Check.

Bowels emptied? Check.

Down 2 pounds? Check.

I'm glad the fasting day worked. And all my other "ailments" have been resolved.

Dawne, I have to weigh every day and keep a close eye on my weight for 21 days. It's part of the HCG protocol once you're done with the low calorie part. It takes 21 days for your hypothalamus to be reset. Thus, it's super important to weigh every day. If you gain more than 2 pounds, you have to fast to lose that weight within a day to stay as close to possible as your lowest weight at the end of the low calorie part. That way, your body resets at the lowest weight. Does that even make sense? :-P

I don't have much time, busy day with super grumpy kids. I will not bake and eat to relieve my stress, though!!!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


Howdy All,
Today, I am fasting. I gained a pound yesterday, putting me slightly over 2 pounds. So, today I fast.

The thing is, I *totally* didn't deserve to gain a pound. I ate:

1 boiled egg white
4 bites of fat free cottage cheese
1/4 Mexican pizza (granted, this was FULL of fat but I really only ate 10 bites or so.)
12 +/- tortilla chips with pinto beans
2 corn tortillas with 96% fat free beef, fat free refried beans, a dab of sour cream and a sprinkling of mozzarella cheese
1 bowl of Life cereal with almond milk
2 cups of coffee with creamer

Does that equal gaining a pound? No. Especially since I got sick after eating the tacos and threw up. (TMI, I apologize).

I'm a little fed up, but know there are several factors involved. I'm about to start my period, so I'm bloated/retaining water. I didn't drink nearly enough water yesterday. I need to have some waste management action.

I'm hoping that once my period starts, I go poo and all the water I'm drinking today kicks in that I'll be down again.

The thing is, it's never been this way before. I've NEVER gained this much, this easily after a round of HCG. I think quitting early and not going off properly has really screwed me up. I'm trying to be very careful because I refuse to gain back the weight I lost. I want to do my last round in April or so (hopefully Josh won't be working in another state Mon-Thurs by then) and I want it to be my last. If I'm careful and do it right, I should have between 6-11 pounds to lose to be at goal.

So we'll see. I'm super frustrated and a tiny bit scared about what's going on with my body currently. Most people do NOT gain 2-3 pounds in as many days while eating as little as I have been. I have not been pigging out. Well, the one day I ate 2 scones... that wasn't entirely necessary. One would've been sufficient. But one scone doesn't equal 2 pounds.

Also, on my Game Plan from yesterday... doing workout videos. Um, that's not working out so well. The thing is that I currently have 4 kids three days a week and am a single parent for 4 days of the week. That takes a lot of time and energy. If I want to do my videos that means I have to get up early, before the kids to do them. Cuz once they are up we are busy and going places. I don't have the energy to do it at night once the kids are finally in bed, that's for sure.

I feel at an impasse. I'm not sure what to do, besides very carefully monitor what I eat and strive for mostly lean meats and vegetables.

Julie-What was that shake stuff you mentioned in your comment? Do you get it online?

I've had a busy day today and I'm STARVING. I can't wait for dinner when I can have my steak and apple. :-P Hopefully I'll be down tomorrow, and not just by a little bit.

I'll check in tomorrow and let you know how I did!

Monday, January 24, 2011

The Game Plan

Morning everyone!

How are you? I'm good. Tired, but good. We had a fairly busy weekend around here. Josh was gone at a men's conference so on Saturday we hung out at my mom's all day, then went to the park. Yesterday we played at an indoor playground and then were at Josh's parents all day.

My weight today was 137.6, up from my lowest of 136.2 but I expected that. Yesterday I was at 138.4 so I lost a bit since yesterday, which is good.

The weekend was a bit scattered and my mom and I made those chocolate orange scones on Saturday. I had two. They were REALLY good. I also had half of the whiskey river bbq burger on Friday night, and it too was really good. Yesterday I was more careful, but still ate a handful of M&Ms and half a cream cheese danish.

I think it will be easier to eat healthy and watch my calories during the week, as I'm home with my kiddos and can prepare healthy food.

My game plan going forward is to do exercise videos, in addition to being careful about what and how much I eat. I hope to do Jillian's Shred 3x a week and my Leslie Sansone video 2x a week. I'm not sure I'll be able to work out 5 days a week, especially with Josh gone, and Kate in school for a few hours and what not, but I'll do my best.

To be honest, I'm filled with dread at the thought of exercising. I have not learned to love it yet. It's hard and it hurts and I sweat and it takes time and then there's no time to recover because I have kiddos to look after. But I know if I want to get down to goal and not gain, then it's necessary. So I'll do what I can.

Not much else going on around here. I'm off to get the kiddies ready for the day. Have a great one!

Friday, January 21, 2011



That's what I was at this morning. I am tempted to keep going, but I know that it's time to stop. For this round. Then in April I'll do my last round and hopefully get down to 125. That's my hope, anyway.

Yesterday I sort of freaked out. As soon as I knew I was done, I wanted to celebrate. With food. ;-) I ate 1 granola bar, 3 Ritz crackers and 2.5 pieces of (homemade, DELICIOUS) pizza. But then, yeah. I got majorly ill and threw up. THAT was emotional, thoughtless eating/bingeing and I can clearly see it. I was hungry. I was missing my husband super bad. I was dead tired from the week with my kids. I was drained from resisting food for the last 3 weeks. And I went overboard.

I'm glad I can see it. I feel much more even-keeled and balanced this morning. I feel like the crazy, pyscho, MUST EAT ALL FOOD IN SIGHT NOW bubble has burst and food isn't the most important thing anymore.

In fact, I don't even really care about my beloved Whiskey River BBQ hamburger. I could never eat one again and would be just fine. Yeah, EMOTIONAL CRAVINGS. That's what I was having yesterday, and in fact, for the last part of this round. I was projecting my exhaustion, my stress, my PMS onto food.

I'm so thankful to be aware of these emotions and tendencies. I am so glad to be able to work through them, so that I never balloon up again.

I know I'll gain between 1-2 pounds once I start eating, and that's totally normal. But I'm not going to throw caution to the wind and just begin mindlessly eating. And although I *LOVE* to bake, and we're talking really, really, really love... I'm going to have to be careful. Really watch portion control. Cuz those orange and dark chocolate scones are still calling my name. Along with a lot of other things. ;-)

I'm off for the day. Have much to do and look forward to; a date with my hubby!!! I think we're going to see The Green Hornet.

Hope you all have lovely Fridays and delightful weekends, full of success and moderation!

PS Sorry for the huge font, I have changed it 5 times but it's not being reflected in the post. All the easier to read, my dear!?!? :-D

Soooooooo Close!


That's what I was at this morning. I am tempted to keep going, but I know that it's time to stop. For this round. Then in April I'll do my last round and hopefully get down to 125. That's my hope, anyway.

Yesterday I sort of freaked out. As soon as I knew I was done, I wanted to celebrate. With food. ;-) I ate 1 granola bar, 3 Ritz crackers and 2.5 pieces of (homemade, DELICIOUS) pizza. But then, yeah. I got majorly ill and threw up. THAT was emotional, thoughtless eating/bingeing and I can clearly see it. I was hungry. I was missing my husband super bad. I was dead tired from the week with my kids. I was drained from resisting food for the last 3 weeks. And I went overboard.

I'm glad I can see it. I feel much more even-keeled and balanced this morning. I feel like the crazy, pyscho, MUST EAT ALL FOOD IN SIGHT NOW bubble has burst and food isn't the most important thing anymore.

In fact, I don't even really care about my beloved Whiskey River BBQ hamburger. I could never eat one again and would be just fine. Yeah, EMOTIONAL CRAVINGS. That's what I was having yesterday, and in fact, for the last part of this round. I was projecting my exhaustion, my stress, my PMS onto food.

I'm so thankful to be aware of these emotions and tendencies. I am so glad to be able to work through them, so that I never balloon up again.

I know I'll gain between 1-2 pounds once I start eating, and that's totally normal. But I'm not going to throw caution to the wind and just begin mindlessly eating. And although I *LOVE* to bake, and we're talking really, really, really love... I'm going to have to be careful. Really watch portion control. Cuz those orange and dark chocolate scones are still calling my name. Along with a lot of other things. ;-)

I'm off for the day. Have much to do and look forward to; a date with my hubby!!! I think we're going to see The Green Hornet.

Hope you all have lovely Fridays and delightful weekends, full of success and moderation!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Well, I'm done.

Contrary to this morning's post, I'm calling it quits. Why the sudden change of heart? Well, my wonderful husband surprised me by scheduling a date night for us tomorrow!! And he remembered that earlier in the diet I said I wanted a burger from Red Robin when I was done, so that's where we're going. Which means, I need to quit my drops today so that they'll be out of my system by tomorrow when I indulge in this:

Have you seen anything more beautiful!? :-D It's the Whisky River BBQ Burger. And I can't wait to eat it. Although, I'll probably only be able to finish 1/4 of it. Maybe 1/2. It's a HUGE burger. Even thought I order it without mayo, this thing weighs in at 894 calories!!!! Insane. But so so so good. I just discovered that if you order it with no bun in knocks the calories down to 644, so that's probably what I'll do. No bun, no mayo, eating half would be 322 calories which isn't as horrible as 1, 114 that are in the original, unaltered burger. :-O

I don't plan to indulge in such fattening food on a regular basis, but for this one night I'll enjoy every single bite.

We're also going to see a movie afterward; I'm not sure what yet.

Anyway, just wanted to let you all in on the fact that this girl is done for this round. I expect to gain between 1-2 pounds, as is normal and usual once I start eating regular food. That'll still keep me in the 130's (albeit the high 130's) and I will take measures to keep as close to 10-12 pounds left to lose as possible.

That way, I can officially be FINISHED forever with HCG and be at my goal weight. I don't intend to ever let my weight creep up to the 170's again. EVER.

So that's all. Tomorrow think of me as I am blessed with a date night, a delicious burger and a movie with the love of my life. =)

Thanks for all your support and prayers! I will definitely keep the blog going, as I want to keep track of my weight and be accountable. If my weight goes up, my ticker will too. I do have a plan of attack, however, which I'll share tomorrow. =)

Apple Day

Hola! Well, there's good news and there's bad news.

The good news is I was down another 0.6 pounds today so I've officially hit the 10 pounds lost mark. The bad news is I totally cheated yesterday and ate a homemade granola square. Sugar? Check. Fat? Check. Hitting myself over the head? Check. ;-)

Actually, I don't really feel that bad about it. I was so close to just giving up the whole thing. I mean, really, how much more can I lose in 2 days? Is it worth torturing myself or should I stop now? But I decided I was going to finish what I started, even if I gained today. Luckily, I still lost. But in my experience the 2nd day is when the weight would show up. So, I've decided to do an apple day today (eat only 5 apples) to help decrease the damage.

I'm at 136.8 and I'd so so so love to see 135 by Saturday, even if it's 135.8. So we'll see what I can do these last two days. I think the apple day will help; and I'm actually excited about apples because I'm sick and tired of chicken and cottage cheese anyway.

Georgia-Welcome to the Skinny Turtle!! You would definitely lose weight just from consuming 500 calories a day; but you'd be starving your body. Basically you'd be anorexic. With HCG (the pregnancy hormone) it releases stored fat to be burned for energy, so your body doesn't go into starvation mode. Does that make sense? Feel free to ask more questions if you have any.

MaryBeth- Thanks for your concern for my "plumbing". ;-) I haven't needed to resort to a mild laxative yet, but there are definitely some days where I wish I could just empty my bowels!

Matt-My husband is amazing. He's loved me at my heaviest, he's loved me at my craziest. Of course, he loves the slimmer me as well, mostly because *I* feel better about myself and it shows. I wear cute dresses that I haven't worn since our honeymoon almost 7 years ago. We're planning a trip to Long Beach, CA for his birthday in May, and I'm actually looking forward to wearing swimsuits and shorts and cute dresses!

That's about it for today. I've got another busy day and Josh isn't coming home until way late tonight; after we're all in bed. I can feel that I'm losing control a bit, because on top of the low energy, PMS stuff, acting-out kiddos, there was a full moon last night! And seriously, it makes a difference. So I took a Xanax yesterday and I'll take one again today to get me through until Josh comes home... for the evening tomorrow. Then he's gone for the weekend to a men's conference... and then gone again on Monday. Lord, please help me!!!!

If you think to pray for me and my children, that we can all adjust to this schedule, it would be greatly appreciated!!

Have a wonderful day, and I'll be back tomorrow with more good news, hopefully. =)

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

3 days. 1500 Calories.

That's how long I have left. 3 days. 1500 calories will be consumed in those three days. Isn't that just totally nuts!?!?! In three days I will consume the same amount (or less!!) than most people eat in one day.

And I can feel it, people. I. AM. DONE. I want to make and eat food. I don't want to be restricted anymore. I'm branching out, eating things that aren't approved. Not bad things, but things like egg whites, pinto beans, rotisserie chicken--all of which has salt on it. Today I only lost 0.2, however I'm not worried or even sad about it. I've lost 2 pounds total in the last four days. There are bound to be low loss days following higher loss days. Plus, I did eat a lot of salt yesterday.

I will not be continuing past Friday, even if I have drops left (and I think I just may have 1-2 days worth of drops left, even with upping my drops to 36 a day instead of 30). I can feel that I am at the end of the road for this round, and I am okay with that. I won't be at 135. I will maybe be in the high 136's. But that's okay. I plan to do my last round in April. And then I will be at my goal weight. Cuz I can lose 10 pounds in a round, especially if 3-4 days aren't compromised by bad drops.

I've lost 9.4 pounds so far this round, so I think I can make it to 10 total. But I'll have to be very strict, very conscious, and not throw in the towel like I so badly want to do right now.

See, it's been fairly hard to be a single mom to 3 very active, very hyper, very needs-hands-on-attention-most-of-the-day children. Eating only 500 calories a day. And no reprieve at the end of the day. And now this week is my PMS week, which makes me even more tired, crampy, grumpy. And all I want to do is have a good, home-cooked warm meal. And some chocolate. But, I will wait. I will endure til the end.

And, Lord help me, I will not gorge on Saturday. Technically, you're supposed to wait 2 days after you stop the drops and continue eating 500 calories a day. But I've never done that. I've found that the drops are definitely out of my system within 24 hours and I begin eating regular people food. ;-) But in moderation. So I'll really try to reign myself in and not overdo it.

So here we go. 3 more days. I can do this. Right!!?? Yes, I can!!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Keeping it clear and.... I cheated

Good Morning, folks!

I lost 0.8 this morning, which I'm quite happy about. Especially cuz I cheated yesterday. It wasn't even a huge cheat. It was a nibble. A tiny nibble, even. But still, a cheat. I tried to make the kids homemade granola bars, but several factors were working against me. For one, I tried to double the recipe and that does NOT work with this recipe. For two, I ran out of oatmeal and subbed cheerios, which again, does NOT work. So I ended up with a 9x13 pan of delicious smelling peanut butter granola crumbles. And I nibbled a piece. Basically it was a cheerio and rice krispy with some peanut butter on it. And it was good. ;-)

I had to battle the rest of the day not to go shove my face in the pan and finish it off. It would even be delicious on top of ice cream or mixed in with vanilla yogurt. I came up with all kinds of delicious ways to enjoy it. ;-) But I did not eat another smidgen. Go me!

I have 4 days left, including today, and I'd really love to be down to 135 by Friday. I'm at 137.6 today so it's a stretch. But I don't want to compromise my chances by doing something dumb. Like cheating.

Also, in relation to my water intake: instead of measuring the number of ounces I've been drinking, I've just been striving to keep my pee clear. I've started drinking a glass of water every time I go to the bathroom, and every time I get thirsty in between. So far, so good. I also drink an extra glass if I go pee and it's not clear.

That's about it for today; I have a busy day and 4 rambunctious kiddos to tend to. My niece Savannah is here and she is letting me know she is done with breakfast and would like out of the highchair now, thankyouverymuch! :-D

Have a great day!

Monday, January 17, 2011

Weird Scale

Hello, Fellow Blog Friends!

How was your weekend? I had a fantastic one. =) It's always so nice to have Josh here. Absence really DOES make the heart grow fonder!! On Saturday we hung around the house in the morning, then I took Kate to a birthday party and got 4 hours of alone time! FOUR HOURS!! I went shopping and it was actually quite fun. I got 2 dresses, one size 8 and one size 10. I'll post pictures of them when I wear them.

Then that evening Josh and I watched Psych and THEN Jen and Martin came over. SO NICE! We had lots of fun just chatting it up. I'm so lucky to have such awesome friends and family.

Ok so the weird scale thing... This morning when I got up at 6:30, went to the bathroom adn weighed it showed I hadn't lost anything from yesterday. 138.8 which is a little odd but I did eat an extra ounce of chicken at lunch and then had refried beans for dinner (which isn't technically allowed on the diet, but they are fat free and have close to the same amount of calories). So I thought maybe I just overdid it a bit. So I get back in bed and lay there for 10 minutes or so until my kids are done snuggling in bed with me. I get them settled with a snack and decide to weigh again, because usually it goes down a bit after I walk around some. (Weird, huh?) So I weigh again and it says 138.6, so a loss of 0.2 pounds. Then I feel like I need to use the restroom, but hardly anything comes out. I only mention this because then I weighed AGAIN and it was down ANOTHER 0.2, for a total loss of 0.4 pounds.

I stepped on the scale 3 times and it stayed at 138.4, so that's what I recorded for my weight. Isn't that weird though? Usually I step on it and it is what it is.

Anyway, I'd best be off now. I have a house to clean up and my kiddos need to be wrangled. ;-)

I hope you had a great weekend and I hope you have a wonderful Monday!

Friday, January 14, 2011

Hello, 130's. I have arrived!

I lost 0.6 putting me at 139.4 and I'm so happy! I actually "cheated" a little yesterday. And by cheated I mean I ate 2% cottage cheese instead of fat free and I had some regular ol' ground beef (not extra, extra lean) with lettuce and salsa.

Yesterday was my niece's first birthday! Happy Birthday, Lilly!! We had a family get together and my sis made fresh tacos/burritos. They got the flour tortillas that aren't cooked yet, and then fried those babies up. They made fresh salsa (Lilly's dad is half Hispanic and knows how to cook!!) and it all looked and smelled so so so so good. I'm happy that I didn't cheat more. I wanted to make 3 or 4 tortillas, stuff them with beans, meat, cheese, avocados, sour cream, salsa and lettuce and enjoy every single bite.

I'm starting to miss food, can you tell? LOL!! :-D

I didn't do so well with my water yesterday until late in the evening. After we put the kids to bed Josh and I watched Despicable Me together. We liked it; it was funny. :) Anyway, while watching the movie I drank 58oz or so. And then proceeded to have to use the bathroom for many hours afterward. :-P And I also got sick because I drank it so fast; but it stayed down which is the important part.

So all in all, I'm very happy with my 0.6 loss today. And I'm hoping to continue this good losing streak. I really don't know if I'll be able to extend my diet, as I'm clearly focusing on food, but we'll see. I plan to evaluate two things before I make my decision: My weight next Friday (my last day) and how full my bottle of drops is. If I'm close to 135, I'll do it a few more days just to solidly be in the 130's for sure. And if I only have a few days worth of drops left, I'll do it until my drops are gone.

So I'll keep you posted on that, sometime next week when I have a better idea of how it's all going to end up. One thing is for sure, though. I've arrived in the 130's, I'm happy to be here, and I look forward to passing on through into the 120's and then staying there!!

Happy, Happy Friday fellow bloggers! I hope you have a wonderful and successful weekend!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Forward Progress

Down another pound today, huzzah!

I'm so happy to see the scale moving again. It makes the lack of eating worth it. ;-)

Lately I've been reading far too many food blogs. It's not good for me. I mean, look:

Jenna at Eat Live Run made these triple layer mint s'more brownies. I can NOT get them out of my head.

Joy, at Joy the Baker has been making all kinds of savory dishes like whole wheat molasses bread and ingenious sweets like chocolate peanut butter pretzel brownies. (Sensing a trend with the brownies, yet?) She also has an AMAZING recipe (well, I haven't tried it yet but you can bet your bottom dollar I will be) for cinnamon rolls with cream cheese folded into the actual dough.

And then there's Darla from Bakingdom. Dear, talented, makes-me-drool-on-my-laptop Darla. She has all manner of delicious sweet treats, from chocolate malt ice cream to lavender short bread cookies to vanilla chai cupcakes.

If that's not enough, Rachel from Heart of Light made Rosemary Butter Cookies and Salted Caramel Sauce for Christmas gifts. Must. Try. Them.

So, you see my dilemma!?!? SO many good recipes to try, yet I can eat nothing but chicken, broccoli/cauliflower/salad and apples/oranges. Speaking of apples and oranges, this is what the drawers look like today:

Looking pretty sparse, about time to stock up again. I really enjoy the apples with cinnamon and truvia, and if the orange is sweet it's a real treat, too. Lately it seems the oranges have been more dry and flavorless.

I apologize for all the delicious recipes above; it's really cruel to post such things on a weight loss blog, but I can't help myself. I love to bake and I will be making every single one of those recipes in the future. And I'm quite excited about it. ;-)

In other news, I'm thinking of extending this round by 4-7 days. I cringe when I think about how much more weight I could have lost if my drops were working the whole time, and I want those pounds gone. I have 2 weddings to attend in February and I'd like to be firmly in the 130's for them. Meaning, 135 at least. So we'll see. It's perfectly safe to continue the diet for longer but I just don't know if I can hold out that long. We'll have to see.

Happy Thursday!!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Now THAT'S more like it!

Hip Hip Hooray!! I lost 0.8 today, almost a whole pound. Proof positive, in my opinion, that the other bottle of drops was a total dud. I am so happy. I was really, really, really struggling. And basically, I think I was pretty much starving myself for real and my body was shutting down. Without the HCG to release the fat, my body was holding onto it for dear life and not letting it go.

But now we're back on the right track, so I'm very happy.

I plan to make my chicken soup again; it's so yummy and just what I need on these bitterly cold days.

And to top it all off, Josh comes home tomorrow!! In 33 hours, to be precise. ;-) And on top of all THAT goodness, I think I may actually have a bowel movement today. Sorry to be so gross, but I haven't had one since last week. Yeah. Not good. Hopefully the fat being released, coupled with the water I'm drinking, tripled with the fiber I'm eating will result in all that junk being released. Which would equal MORE weight loss, and I'm all for that!

I'll leave you with a picture of my usual snack: sliced apples sprinkled with Truvia and cinnamon:

I hope you have a very good Wednesday!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

My 333rd post on 1/11/11

Hi Guys!
Sorry for the late post; I had a busy day.

So, guess what? The bottle of drops I've been using is a dud. At least, that is the conclusion my mom and I came to. Here's the story:

I began the diet on the 1st using a bottle of drops I had leftover from my last round; which I had to end early because I was turning into Miss Psycho. I knew I didn't have enough for the whole round, so I ordered more. Except, they sent me the wrong thing. They sent me the detox drops instead of the HCG drops. So my mom gave me her (open) bottle to use until I could exchange the detox drops. She had used this bottle back in November for 5 days but never got over the intense feeling of hunger, so she quit.

Now I've had the same experience. Plus, my weight loss has screeched to a halt (basically) since I started using them. This leads us to believe the bottle is defunct. I have a new bottle that I'll be starting tonight and Lord help me, I hope it works!!!

Today I lost a measly 0.2 pounds. That's roughly 3.5 ounces. And I haven't been cheating, so the weight should be coming off much more quickly, as I've only lost 0.6 in the last 3 days. Not cool when I'm only eating 500 calories a day. I also upped my water intake today, so I sure hope to see a more significant drop on the scale tomorrow. Or the next day.

Today was excruciating. I was busy all day; took the boys and Savannah to the library in the morning, then picked Kate up from school, then headed to my mom's house. We ended up staying there all afternoon (thanks, Mom!) and the whole time I was starving. My stomach was growling and actually hurt. I had eaten an apple and my chicken+salad and was drinking water, but it wasn't helping.

It didn't help that my sister and brother were making hamburgers and seasoned fries, burritos, and all other manner of delicious food!!! Sheer torture, I tell ya. But I stood strong. Not even a nibble of anything.

I came home and made chicken soup with chicken broth, chicken, broccoli and 1/2 a teaspoon of some organic, sodium free chicken bouillon I had. It was really good, so I'll definitely be making it again. Then I baked an apple with lemon juice, Truvia and cinnamon; it too was super good. But now I am left with nothing else available to eat for the night. I'm thinking I'll turn in early with the kids because A) I'm tired and B) if I'm sleeping I won't be thinking about how hungry I am.

I also need to extend an apology to Matt... since the drops aren't working it's quite possible my body has gone into starvation mode and my weight gain wasn't due to the lotion. I apologize, Matt. ;-)

I've got to go clean up and get the kiddies ready for bed, so I'll check in again tomorrow; hopefully with more than a 0.4 loss!! =) That would bring me below 141.6 which is where I was at for the majority of the time after my last round. There was a day or two where I weighed 139, but 141.4ish was my maintenance weight. I'm looking forward to getting below it and getting into the 130's!

Monday, January 10, 2011

I hate to say I told you so....

But lotion *did* cause me to gain weight. =( It was the only thing I changed; I applied it twice to my hands in one day, on Friday and on Saturday... well on Saturday I actually didn't weigh because my boys bounced out of bed at 6a.m. and I was so tired that I dragged myself straight to the coffee pot and drank a cup. But when I stepped on the scale after that (and I estimate I drank 6oz of coffee and 6oz of water) I was up a full pound.

Today I weighed in at 142.0, which is great and all, but I was really hoping I'd be back down to 141.6 by today. Oh well, on with the journey.

I've lost 4.8 pounds in the last week and I'll keep at it. But won't be using lotion anymore. ;-) PS: No hard feelings, Matt! :-D

Today I woke up with a headache; partly because I was up at 4 to say good bye to Josh and then took a while to fall back asleep and then up again at 6 with my boys. I think some water will help with that.

I did buy more tea varieties:

I've had the chai and the Black Cherry Berry and they are both very good. My sister is bringing me some licorice tea to try; I personally really like black licorice, so I'm hoping I'll like the tea. I don't know if I'll be able to drink more than a cup a day, but even one will help with my water intake AND keep my tummy full.

I've been struggling the past 4 days or so with being really hungry. I haven't cheated even a little bit (phew!!) but it's hard when my mind keeps going back to food all day. Doesn't help that the books I'm reading describe food in detail, or the fact that I'm making my family good meals. ;-)

I am going to up my HCG drops a bit, as I've heard that's what you're supposed to do if you have the sensation of hunger all the time. You shouldn't feel hungry because you're body should be burning fat; and clearly mine isn't burning it as fast anymore. It has really slowed down the last 3 days. So I'm hoping that more drops + increased water will get this train rolling again.

Other than that, I'm doing well. It's so nice to have Josh here on the weekends, but so hard to see him go. I'm hoping it won't be this way for much longer, but we just don't know how long it will be. For now I'm just taking it a day at a time and not focusing on the future.

I've got 12 days of low calorie left, and I'm really hoping to be down into the 130's by then. 137 or less would be just great! 135 would be even better. ;-)

I hope you all had a good weekend!

Friday, January 7, 2011


Happy Friday, everyone!

I'm so happy it's Friday, even though our weekend is fairly busy and I won't be seeing all that much of my husband. =( He did make it home by 8:00 last night, though, so that was nice. =)

I was down to 142.8 this morning, for a loss of 0.8 which makes me happy. Every morning I have this fear that I'll step on the scale and it'll have skyrocketed. I'm not sure why. I'm not cheating on my diet, but I guess I feel heavy. I feel heavy enough to tip the scales right back into the 170's, my highest weight.

Part of the problem is that I continue to be constipated. I'm not really sure how this is possible given the amount of water I'm drinking, plus eating an apple and orange a day, as well as cauliflower or broccoli. But, them's the facts. ;-)

I'm headed out to the store today to look for some more teas. The chai I spoke about earlier this week was really good, but I can only manage a cup of it a day, if that. Then it gags me. So I'm going to look for some other flavors to get me through the day. I've been much hungrier the last two days. Yesterday I was starving and all day long visions of food floated through my head. I made my kiddos seasoned french fries and boy howdy I wanted to dive in face first!!

I did find a super great alternative to chicken yesterday: pinto beans! They don't have any fat but are fairly high in calories. One cup has 234 calories, which is almost HALF my daily allowance! (How crazy is that!?!?) Anyway, I ate half a cup of beans with salt (so good, by the way. Seriously.) and it was such a nice break from chicken. I think I'll keep it in my rotation. I also need to get more vegetable options today, as the last 2 days I haven't eaten all my allotted veggies, which is why I've been more hungry methinks.

Confession: I haven't done a single crunch or push up. =( I just don't have the energy. I feel a little weak, and don't want to expend energy on it right now, as all my energy goes to my kids and housework. Sort of important since I'm the only one here 4 days of the week. ;-) So I'll keep trying to get them in, but I'm not beating myself up about it if it doesn't happen.

I hope you have a lovely weekend! I'm hoping by Monday I'll be in the 130's. :-D

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Reptilian, much?

Morning Mates!

How are you this fine Thursday? I'm good. But I've got a problem on my hands. Literally.

Drinking water = many bathroom trips = much washing of the hands = dry, cracked, chapped hands = problem. Why is it a problem you ask? Why not get some thick, creamy, dense hand repair cream and slather it on? Well, because they ALL have oil in them!!!

And, on this diet, you're not supposed to have fat or oil. Skin is the body's largest organ, so if I were to slather on the lotions, I'd gain weight. I'm having some issues with this anyway, because I make my kiddos PB & J sandwiches using organic, natural peanut butter. The kind with the oil on top. The kind that oil oozes all over the place, down the jar leaving it perpetually oily, and all over the knife and my fingers.

I also made them pizza the other night, and was putting the pepperoni on when I realized my hands were really greasy.

But, you know what? I'm not gonna stop feeding my kids. :-D So if my weight loss slows down because of all the oil I'm touching, so be it.

So for now, my hands resemble some type of scaly lizard. They are SO chapped and dry. They are bleeding. They hurt. Waaaahhhh!!!!

Ok, done with that now.

I lost 0.6 today, down to 143.6 which I am happy with. Hoping to get back to 141.6 (where I was at before I gained) by next Monday. That'll leave me with two weeks to hopefully lose 5-7 pounds. Not sure if it'll happen, but that's what I'm shooting for.

Last night I heated my chicken up in 1 cup of low sodium vegetable broth, and added my broccoli in. So I had broccoli chicken soup and you know what? WAAAAAAYYYYY easier to eat my chicken this way!

I didn't eat the broth, and even if I would have it didn't have any fat and was only 15 calories.

I'm finding I get really hungry in the afternoons, so it helps to have 2 servings of veggies then. Although, yesterday I only ate one of my servings. I didn't feel like adding in cauliflower to my soup and I don't have any other options for vegetables in my fridge right now.

I have been having 1 small (4oz) cup of coffee the last two days, with 1-2 TBSP fat free caramel vanilla creamer in it. That adds 25-50 calories to my day, (if I finish the whole thing, which I don't always do) so I think that's why my weight loss slowed down today. Plus, for me anyway, it usually slows down the first week and then I lose partial pounds the rest of the time.

I'm happy with how it's going though and can't complain.

Josh comes home today!!!! Although, Thursdays (the day he comes home for the week) are always hard because I just want to see him already! I miss him! And without fail he ends up getting home way later than he hoped. Usually around 7:30pm or so, which isn't horribly late but he always hopes to leave around 1:00 which would put him home around 5:30 and so those last two hours are sheer torture.

Today he doesn't know what time he'll get to leave because the owner and CEO are both going to be up in the other office and have a meeting scheduled with him. And their meetings tend to go long. Over dinner. =(

So I'm just telling myself that even though I was supposed to finally see him tonight, it might not happen and to just continue on with life as usual. I've been trying to get to bed earlier because it makes a huge difference for me. So I can't wait up until 10 or 11 or 12 for him to get home.

Anyway, that's about it for me. I'm going to my mom's today with my sis for our weekly Thursday Coffee Date. =) I won't be able to enjoy the goodies we usually have, but I'll enjoy my coffee and I'll take my apple along in case I need to munch on something.

Happy Thursday!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

No Complaints

Hello, hello!

How are you today? I'm doing amazingly well. I've been out of my drops from Dr. Ray since Friday; due to the New Year's holiday they weren't able to ship them until Monday. Normally I'd be a basket case on crack right now. But so far, I have felt really good. Even keeled, able to take things in stride, even when the toilet overflows and floods the bathroom for the 5th time, even when Owen throws epic tantrums during story time at the library, even though Josh doesn't get home til tomorrow night. I'm so thankful. Consciously thankful.

I lost 1.2 today. I think. I honestly can't remember what came after the 144; it might have only been 0.8 that I lost. Either way, I'm glad. I feel so much thinner already. I think it's because I'm not bloated from wheat/sugar. I've also cut back on caffeine and drink maybe 4oz a day, if that. Water intake is a work in progress, but getting better daily. My pee is clear, which is supposed to be the sign that you're getting enough water.

I still have a hard time with the chicken. Jen got a glimpse of that last night. ;-) I really need to figure out a different way to bake/cook it. I'm thinking maybe I'll dice it up and boil it in 1/2 cup of chicken broth and eat it like soup. That might help. Otherwise I'm sticking to my plan of 1/2 cup of cottage cheese and an apple in the morning. I've been eating both servings of vegetables in the evening with my chicken, since that's when I'm the most hungry. And then an orange before bed.

I am so incredibly thankful that my mindset and body and emotions/hormones are cooperating!!! So, so thankful. It helps me so much to know that I'm *doing* something about it, so then it's not actually my main focus all day long.

I've started watching my niece, which is such a treat! My Owen is 3 now, so it's so fun to have a littler person around. She cracks me up!!! She chatters/babbles all day and has the hugest, toothiest grin that is just adorable. And Kate LOVES her. They get along famously and I think it really meets a need for Kate to have someone look up to her like that.

I didn't do any exercise yesterday. Totally no excuse, besides the fact that I got tired and lazy. I did hoist Miss Savannah around and my arm is actually sore from that! And she is just a wee bitty thing! I am moving around during the day, but I really want to work on at least doing my crunches and push ups. I can manage those in sets, so today is the day I start on that.

Mary Beth-I honestly don't know how I stuck to the diet the first time, besides the fact that I have real life friends who did it and I saw the weight fall off of them. So I was motivated to give it a go. And then the weight started falling off me and that has kept me motivated. You just have to do whatever works for you, and there have definitely been times where I haven't been able to stick to the diet, and then I've called it quits. You have to know your boundaries, which it sounds like you do! So, YAY YOU! =)

I hope you're all well!!! I got to move my ticker today again, so that is real fun! It also brought me down to less than 20 pounds to lose, so the goal seems tangible. Looking forward to hitting my goal and staying there. 2011 is a year of new beginnings and healthy habits. The End. :-D

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Going Down...


I had a busy morning, so I'm just now getting time to post. I lost 1.4 pounds, and weighed 145.4 this morning. I'll take it! =)

I did just fine yesterday; wasn't super hungry until the evening. I gagged my chicken down--apparently I have major issues with chicken when it's not covered in some sort of sauce-- ate my broccoli, which was actually really good and drank more water.

Look familiar? :-P
Then I ate an orange and called it good. I had 1/2 cup of fat free cottage cheese and an apple earlier in the day.

Last night I had a massive headache. I literally felt like my head was going to explode; there was so much pressure. So I put myself to bed and this morning it was better. It came back but I just took some Ibuprofen and hopefully that helps. Not sure what's up with the headaches. I know if you don't drink enough that can cause them, but I drank lots yesterday. Working on drinking lots today.

Dawne, what kind of water bottle did you get? I'm still searching for one that fits my needs so I'll actually use it.

Matt-HA, funny about the bottom drawer of your fridge holding beer. ;-) I'm more of a hard alcohol girl; I don't like beer. At all.

Allison-SO SO good to hear from you! I've wondered how you've been.

That's about it for today. I am watching my niece and we had a busy morning so I'm using naptime to catch up on housework (and blogging) instead of for my walking video. I'll try to get that in tonight. I didn't do it yesterday because by the end of the day my head was splitting in two.

Catch you on the flip side!

Monday, January 3, 2011

New Year, New Me

Howdy Folks.

So sorry for my long absences. I had my husband home for a whole 10 days!! He had to do work a few times, and go in twice, but for the most part we got to enjoy him the whole time. It was so incredibly nice, especially since he's gone so much for work on a regular basis now.

I plan to be more on top of my blog and blog more frequently because a) I like it when you guys update/blog regularly and b) I need it for accountability and c) it's actually fun to blog when the scale is going down. =)

I binged the last two days. Nothing hard core, but I did eat yummy, salty McDonald's fries last night. The only other thing I had that was really out of the ordinary was a full fat/sugar latte with white chocolate and caramel flavoring. I only drank 1/4 of it before I got sick (from the milk) but it was super yummy.

This morning I weighed in at 146.8; I was sooooooo scared I'd see 150+ on that scale! I haven't stepped on it since the last time I weighed in and I have NOT been restricting myself when it comes to food. So, yeah, 146.8 is definitely higher than I'd like because basically I'm having to re-lose 5.5 pounds, but I'm very, very thankful it's not more.

I'm excited and feel ready for this round of HCG. Right now I'm sipping some chai tea, and it's actually really good. Usually I have a hard time with straight tea because it just tastes like flavored water. Because, it is just flavored water. :-P But this is actually good and I didn't even add Truvia or milk to it.

My plan is to eat fat free cottage cheese and a vegetable for one meal, and chicken and a vegetable for the other meal. If I have time to go get some extra lean hamburger, I'll throw that in the mix too. I also stocked up on apples and oranges. And I am really working on drinking more water. It's a work in progress, but I'm getting there.

I also plan to do my Leslie Sansone walking video. I think I can manage it even while on the 500 calorie part of the diet. If not, then I'll do some push ups and sit ups every day. I may add that in as well as doing the video. Nothing huge or amazing; probably just 20 push ups (not all at once) and 50 crunches. Or something like that.

In other news, I saw an optometrist for my eyes. I'm still having headaches that blur my vision, and over the holidays it was really bad. Basically, this is what I see:

I get really motion sick, actually, because everything is so off. So I went and paid extra for an in-depth eye exam. I had my eyes dilated and after the exam she said everything looks perfectly fine and healthy. My eyes and all the surrounding tissues/ligaments are the shape, color and size they are supposed to be. There's no extra pressure anywhere.

So, the good news is, there isn't anything wrong with my eyes. The bad news is... there isn't anything wrong with my eyes so the problem is coming from somewhere else. This scares me super bad, and has Josh worried as well.

So my next step is to find a provider and go see a (competent!!) doctor. I'll be setting that up here in the next few weeks. It's a bit of a challenge because I don't have a babysitter and Josh isn't available either, so I have to try to do some creative scheduling. But I'm going to make it happen, because I need an answer.j

That about sums it up for me! I'm off to grab another mug of chai, an apple and my cottage cheese and I'm headed over to Jen's house for an over-due visit. =) Our kiddos have been sick so we haven't seen each other in way too long.

Hope you're all well!!