Hello, Hello

Hi Friends!
How have you all been? I've been fantastic! We had a super duper fun time at the beach with our insanely large family.  Josh is one of 16 children (no multiples!!) and every single one of them (and their spouses/children) were there, save the oldest daughter who lives in Canada.

It was a blast, but also a LOT of work.  And also there was a LOT of food.  And I think I gained a LOT of weight.  I was too scared to step on the scale this morning.  I'm not even joking.  My clothes are super tight and when I look in the mirror, I see a person looking back that I haven't seen for a while. I am starting to resemble what I looked like at my heaviest.  And it's scary.

So today, I'm fasting.  I'm drinking water and coffee, and nothing else in an attempt to lose some water retention that I've got going on. I plan to weigh in tomorrow and post the honest to goodness truth of what I see.  Even though I know already it's going to be cringe-worthy.

I seem to have gotten out of control and have been eating and drinking like crazy.  I *feel* out of control, and I don't like it.  I can't decide what my next step should be. 

Part of me wants to get on SparkPeople or The Daily Plate or something and do a calorie restriction plan.  But the problem with that is I have ZERO idea how many calories are in things, so all day I'm constantly running back and forth to the computer to find out.  And if I make a meal, I'm stumped trying to figure out how many calories exactly I am consuming.

The second idea is (DO NOT LAUGH) to start the 17 Day Diet again.  This is a little more do-able because I can have as much protein as I want, don't have to count calories, and just have to stay within the food guidelines.  BUT I tend to freak out because this diet basically cuts out ALL carbs and sugar, and some days I just want to have a scone and coffee.

So I'm not sure what to do, but I do know SOMETHING has to be done.  My brother is getting married, probably in December and I don't want to look the way I did 2 years ago at my brother-in-law's December wedding.  I can't even BELIEVE how big I was.  Almost 170 pounds at 5'4". :-O

I think I'm hovering around 150 right now. =(  At my lowest ever (for like one day) after HCG I got down to 136.  So that's quite a gain, and boy howdy I can feel it. I need to come up with a doable plan because do you know what's coming?

Fall.  I love fall. LOVE IT.  It's my favorite season.  But I love to bake during those crisp fall days, and then I like to eat it.  So I have to figure out a lifestyle change, a "diet" that I can stick with through the holidays and the treats that comes with that.  School starts next week and I am hoping to figure out some type of workout routine.  I'm not sure if Christian has AM or PM kindergarten yet; if he has AM I'm tempted to join a gym and go after I drop the kids off at school.  I'll still have Owen and my niece Savannah, but I could make it work.

At the same time, I know myself and the chances of me actually getting dressed and going to the gym are kinda slim. 

ANYWAY, it's a work in progress.  If you have any ideas or suggestions, I'm all ears.  :-)