Well, yesterday I had a freak out moment. Or, rather, freak out moments. These last 3 days of 500 calories without the drops have been the hardest yet. I think it's because I'm so close to NOT having any restrictions; well, I'll have restrictions. I just won't be limited to chicken and broccoli.
In any case, I made homemade pizza for dinner last night. It was huge and delicious; think New York style pizza. Yes, I ate 1.5 pieces. And half a cookie. And 5 chips. It all sat in my stomach for about 5 minutes before reappearing. I got so violently sick. It was like my body was saying, "Take THAT, you abuser!" I learned my lesson. Gluttony gets me nowhere. I have to do what is best for my body and for my health.
So, although I'm sure I'll have those foods in the future, it will be very occasional and not a lot at one time. For now, I'll be easing back into food instead of throwing myself at it.
Today I am really shaky and weak. I am not sure if it's because I'm not taking the Weight Aid drops or what, but I haven't felt like this the whole time I did the diet. I did lose 4oz today, which was nice. I wasn't sure after that binge fiasco.
The good thing about that binge fiasco is that today I have no desire to shove food mindlessly into my mouth. It was a wake up call, that just because I've somehow been able to restrict myself to 500 calories a day for the last 3 weeks, my journey isn't over. I still need to learn to have a good, healthy relationship with food. Cuz you know what? I was stressed yesterday. And what did I do? Shove food in my mouth. SO not the answer.
So, in a way, I'm glad for that little experience I had yesterday. I'll be aware of the feelings I'm having and how to work through them. I'm learning to eat when I'm hungry and make healthy choices. Fun does not have to include food.
I'm looking forward, so much, to being able to eat more than chicken and broccoli, but at the same time I'm also really looking forward to my next round of HCG. Because it works, quickly. I can see the results. I'm down 14 pounds in 22 days.
I'm headed south again this weekend to celebrate some graduations in our family, so I'm not sure when I'll post again. However, I will be back for sure on Monday with a scale picture. =)
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
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