I don't want to be narcissistic. I really don't. But I'm floundering here.
I hate to even admit it because it seems so incredibly petty and selfish and egotistical. But it is what it is.
I have really lost my motivation for blogging. In a major way. In case you haven't noticed. :-P And the reason is because I hardly get any comments. *hangs head in shame*
I feel so dumb even admitting that. I mean, what am I, four years old??? But it's the truth. It feels like no one is reading if there are no comments, and what's the point of that? I blog for the feedback and the encouragement, just knowing there are others out there going through the same stuff. Or maybe not going through the same stuff, but still willing to listen to my stuff. ;-)
But then, if I'm being honest, I have to admit that I read TONS of blogs and don't comment on the majority of them, even though I honestly enjoy what I read. Which would make me a narcissistic hypocrite. EEEKK!!
I really, really appreciate those of you who do take the time to comment; it makes my day and I feel valued and heard. Which is maybe not right. Something I have to delve into further.
In any case, not much is happening in my diet right now anyway. I'm struggling. I haven't weighed since last Monday, and I'm afraid to. I want to do better, I need to do better, I should do better. I need to figure out a healthy outlet, a healthy routine, something I can stick to.
But so far, I haven't succeeded. It's been too much on top of other things. In the last week a friend of the family and an acquaintance from church have died. One was completely unexpected and the other was a young girl who died of cancer. And that makes me hug my kids tighter and thank the good lord above that my children are healthy! And it also reminds me that my weight is NOT the most important thing.
But then THAT leads me to slack off and then I feel gross and unhealthy. So I'm definitely working on finding a balance.
Anyway, if you managed to read this and not be totally disgusted with my blatant plea for comments ;-), I appreciate it. I think I'm in a slump and I'm working to get out. And I do plan to continue blogging for now. At least to have SOME sort of accountability.
I hope you have a good Monday. The sun is shining here and wow is it nice!!!!!!!