Monday Morning Blues

Hiya Pals,

How are you? I've been better. I feel like I got hit by a truck. My head is pounding, my body aches, I feel emotional (sad and weepy) AND my weight is messing with me. On Saturday I was down to 140.6 (I think; I can't remember exactly). Then yesterday I was UP to 141.0. I have NEVER gained while on the low cal part of the diet before. I have NOT been cheating. I've even been drinking all my water! The day I gained I even skipped my last apple because I didn't feel hungry. And I GAINED!?!?!?

Today I was down 0.2. Pppffffttttt. Such a measly loss for the strict diet I've been sticking to! I do need to have some "waste management" movement, but that shouldn't and has never in the past, caused me to gain. Very frustrating and odd.



BUT then I look at the fact that I've lost almost 5 pounds in 1 week. And I'm within 10ish pounds of my goal, so to lose that much so close to goal is remarkable. It just is really hard to see the scale go up when I'm eating 7 ounces of chicken and 7 ounces of vegetables, plus 2 apples a day and that's it.

I was really, really, really tempted to throw in the towel today. I made almond, cinnamon, vanilla crepes for the kids for breakfast and they smelled so incredibly divine. Then, after I dropped Kate off at school all I wanted to do was bake. Oh my, I do so love to bake! I have an extraordinarily cute apron that I like to wear and it makes the house smell good and all warm and cozy. But the problem is, then I want to eat it.

So, I'm guzzling water instead. I'm hoping that will take care of my headache, help things get moving in my plumbing AND fill me up so I don't go into the kitchen and destroy myself with baked goodies. And I lit a pumpkin spice candle and I'm pretending that the smell is coming from a fresh batch of pumpkin scones. Or maybe pumpkin cranberry bread. MMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmm.

On a much happier note, I had a wonderful time with my sister this weekend! We hung out, chased after our kids, went shopping (A LOT), and stuck to our diets. I am so proud of us!

I don't know if it's wrong or not, but food really does make things more fun and cozy. At least, for us it does. We decided our next visit we will not be on the diet. Not so we can go crazy and eat all kinds of unhealthy food, but so we can cook and bake together, and then sit and chat with our coffee (AND CREAMER!!!!) and baked treat.

However, I was TREAT FREE this week for the challenge.

I have noticed that while on the HCG diet and in doing this treat free challenge that I think about food/treats much more than I normally do. It bothers me, actually. I feel like I'm almost being forced into a ditch where I obsess about food, when in my "normal" life I don't. I enjoy food, yeah. I bake and cook and eat, for sure. But I don't sit around thinking about all the things I can't have.

I think it's too "all or nothing" for me. For my personality, it's better to indulge in a moderate portion of a treat now and then, when the mood strikes, instead of denying myself to the point of a total gorge fest. So after my diet is done, I'll be going back to eating like I normally do, and if that includes a treat, so be it.

But THIS week, I was treat free. ;-)

I hope you are doing well, and that you have a great week!