I do believe I've used that title before. But it aptly describes how I feel. ;-)
I was down another pound today! With luck I'll be in the 150's tomorrow. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. :0)
You guys. I never knew grocery shopping could be torture. But it CAN! I am seriously so hungry ALL. THE. TIME. My stomach is rumbling and has PANGS of hunger. Everything looks delicious. Choosing food for my family and not being able to eat it? Well, that's just mean and wrong.
Dinner time is especially hard for me. I find I actually get MAD about not being able to eat. Last night my family had soft tacos... OH, the beef, the cheese, the avocado, the tomato, the sour cream, the soft, warm tortillas.... I'm drooling. Literally. And what did I have?
My tiny chicken and some (super) mushy asparagus. I accidentally overcooked it and it was honestly pure mush. Think baby food consistency. It was all I could do to choke it down.
I'm not giving up. I'm just keeping it real. Although this has physically been by far the easiest way to lose weight... emotionally it is totally draining. All day I think about food. Because my stomach is telling me it is in need of food! It takes all my willpower not to shove my kiddos' peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in my mouth. All my willpower not to rip into a bag of chips and eat the whole thing.
It's not all bad, though. It is nice to see the scale moving down. I honestly had started to wonder if it was possible. ;-) And 99% of the time I enjoy the food I'm able to eat. The oranges and strawberries are really sweet and yummy. I've started cutting up my apple and sprinkling it with cinnamon and that is very tasty. It's just... a small amount of food to eat all day.
On another note, BONUS POINTS for me as I have been drinking at least 2 liters of water a day. This is nothing short of miraculous for me. I've always had to choke down water.
Thank you for all your words of encouragement!!!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
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Aw...your turtle looks so cute sitting there at 12 lbs, pretty as you please! =)
ReplyDeleteI wanted to say, that I can relate to what you're doing alot. As you know I've done the Master Cleanse 3 times - it's alot like what you're doing but easier in a way since I have no option of eating food whatsoever, so I just put that out of my mind.
I think restriction in any form really is hard to put up with - because alot of it IS psychological. We can't have it so we WANT IT SO BAD!! LOL. But I know what you mean, getting "visions" of yourself just grabbing that food and jamming it into your mouth like a total pig, lol. Like a major homeless starving person who has not eating in like 5 days would.
I'm so proud of you for keeping at it - have you found blogs of anyone else doing it? I think that would probably really help you, or a forum? I think I would have died out long ago on the plan I'm on if I didn't have support of others going through it just like me. On day 4, etc.
Hang in there, and visualize how yummy the things you do get to eat are...and how great is it that you get to eat fruit that is IN SEASON! Yay!